Run Away if You Want to Survive…

Hello hello hello!

What to say?

Before I go off an a ramble you may wonder what I have been up to.  I have been looking at ideas for businesses and feeling confused.  I have been learning a lot of information that I will probably forget.  Big surprise there.

My husband and I went to Bodie, California, this past weekend.  It is an abandoned mining town that is being preserved in a state of arrested decay.  This mostly means that they fix the roofs of the old buildings and prop them up when they look like they are leaning over.  Apparently teenagers used to collect up the gold and silver in mercury balls that they rolled up with their hands.  Yep, those young men were expendable, as were all of the miners.

My brain is overloaded with information as usual.  I’m not so sure my story is going to have a happy ending.  I’m not sure I care any more.  Ergh.  No, I’m not feeling that pessimistic.  I just feel like I have mentally and physically taken on a lot of burdens that are not mine and I just want to walk away from all of them.  It’s not like I’m really doing anyone any good by hanging on to them anyway.  I’m just stressing myself out and getting nowhere.

And you’re probably thinking “What the hell are you talking about?”

I read vague blogs and wonder that.  Like I walked into a movie that is halfway over and the plot line is not so easily deciphered.

I wish I could fully explain everything and that you could fully explain everything to me and we could have a deep understanding of one another that somehow makes everything better.  I think I want friends, but then I think perhaps I am fooling myself.  It is easier to just be the weirdo you that you want to be and not take on so much of the burden of unmet expectations that human relationships entail.

So confused.

I have a fair amount of produce that my yard has produced.  I wish I could send you all a few tomatoes and nectarines, but alas, you are far away.  My garden is not very beautiful, but it has produced a bit of yummy fresh produce.

And my produce is a sort of analogy for my life.  If I don’t figure out a good way to use it, it will just rot away.

Thanks for reading my rambling.  What the heck should I call this post?

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